Why I've Been Gone… struggling with happiness & motivation

Thank you to BetterHelp for sponsoring todays video: https://BetterHelp.com/church for 10% off

Over the past few months, I have been in a rut and found myself always feeling like doing NOTHING. I am typically a motivated, happy, and hopeful person. In this vlog I take 8 steps to work on being happy.

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47 Replies to “Why I've Been Gone… struggling with happiness & motivation”

  1. Over the last few months I've honestly been feeling SO stuck and unmotivated. In these times watching vlogs of others working on their happiness has helped me. I hope this video can help you find some sort of motivation to get out of your rut, too. Here are things I've learned lately that are really helping:
    1. Get Ready Every Day – not everyday has to be a fashion show, but going through some of the motions of putting on make up and doing my hair helps me mentally feel ready for the day, and looking my best makes me feel my best.
    2. Practicing Gratitude – I know this one is obvious and everyone says it, but seriously. Writing down things that I am grateful for FIRST thing in the morning 1000% helps my mindset throughout the entire day.
    3. Hedonic Adaptation – understanding this concept made me realize I was CONSTANTLY chasing what's next. Living a happier life is about enjoying hte smaller things and keeping up your "baseline happiness"
    4. Future Fantasizing – This was probably my #1 mistake I was making leading to my unhappiness. I'm such a dreamer. Dreaming is fun and easy. Then when it comes down to making those dreams a reality I felt overwhelmed and didn't know where to start. Now I am reminding myself not to think too big, and take things in 24-72 hour increments.
    5. Find a life-long hobby that you love and prioritize it! I start my week scheduling a time to prioritize my greatest hobbies. Before, I was working all of the time and not giving myself a moment to go enjoy the things I love most.
    6. Find a workout that works for you. We need to move our bodies for our health physically and mentally. I feel a great difference on days I workout, but for so long was not consistent. I've found a workout that I can really look forward to and do all the time.
    7. Sign up to try something new! This will get you out of your comfort zone and you will be happy you did it:)

    Hope this helps!

  2. KitalAlin says:

    Cool video. A lot to think of. Thanks

  3. Justathought says:

    Happiness comes and goes. It is not a permanent state. Contentment. Purpose, fulfilment, gratitude … peace. Foundations for life 🤍

  4. Suzie N says:

    It does help to be a bit more spiritual in this materialistic world. Just letting go and being imperfect. Also, one may consider going to a psychotherapist. Taking a sabbatical to figure out what truly makes you happy can also be beneficial.

  5. Eliz Beth says:

    I am having similar problems. I decided to read How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie. The advise is old and fundamental we all been hearing all our lives since we were born. The book helps hit home.

  6. Such a beautiful video. Loved the editing

  7. Jacob Watson says:

    I liked this video! I learned new things and I liked how realistic it was 🙂

  8. David Naser says:

    Hi Monica want to say an Honor to follow your journey! My sister once told me for inspiration to achieve my potential from day to day, "everyone experience the same time, what you do with your time will determine your outcome." I took this personal quote from her especially during college and kept with me ever since. My time is my own journey that makes me happy. Everyone's time is of their own that will reflect their journey. Team Monica Always! 😊

  9. B Liu says:

    Stop doing and start being! You're not a human doing but a human being.

  10. Mellisa says:

    This video was meant to be watched. I’ve been stuck for almost a year, im 37 my daughter I raised is now 19 on her own… I have no experience with working so I am in the spot where idk what to anymore I am older, I am a risk to any sort of career but I am great with computers…. Raising Macaela was the best choice I’ve made in life.. but now the sadness and stuck mentality is there. If you could reach out to me so we can talk one on one I would appreciate it so much Monica. Please. ❤

  11. Allie M says:

    JESUS! He is the answer I promise!!❤❤❤

  12. Monica I am Grateful for you. Thank you for your You Tubing!!!

  13. Martin Frog says:

    Walking Zen is the same as Diving Zen … The focus that made you good at diving was like hitting the target before you jump … Slow the exhale …
    The same applies to Golf or Creating a new Web Based Business … I myself have never called my passions hobbies … or goals …

  14. Luz Arteaga says:

    This is so real and helpful to me. Thank you for posting this.

  15. peacef77 says:

    So sorry to hear your struggle! To me, true happiness is a "blessed" life, and it only comes when we seek God first, above all else. When Paul wrote the beautiful joyful Book of Philippians, he was in a Roman prison- his joy was from the LORD. Blessings to you! (p.s; God wants you to have a blessed life full of joy and love!)

  16. Nobody says:

    Keeping yourself glued together with all the things someone should attend to, is impressive. (Keeping life in good operational order). |||| Making time for personal zone-out / biz. check-out / escape our business activities; is golden. 👍

  17. M Thomas says:

    Such a nice vid Monica👏👏👏👏👏

  18. Bookslover says:

    I think I achieved happiness already Even when I have not the half of the things I want to have in my future. Literally I'm living in a country where there is no chance to earn good money. We just survive. We don't have sometime accès to things like water or eggs. And eventhough I am solo happy. My family I healthy I have a beautiful niece. We share family time which is the best for me. It is important to be thankful. For what u have. No matter what. there are a lot of people in a situation worst that yours. I always think about that when I don't feel good. U are going to be better just work on yourself and try to look the reason behind that. There is always a reason.
    PD: keep in mind. That some time feeling like that has to do with period and hormones. Reach for that information. Sometime I have felt sad and without energy. And it is just part of my cycle.
    Happiness it is not a forever feeling. Life has ups and downs. And that is ok too.

  19. She was here says:

    Thank you for this video Monica!! Excessive Future Fantasizing is a real thing! But taking it one week at a time really helps! 💕

  20. You could add the Sea-Fab coffee shop to your "Trying EVERY coffee shop in Seattle" video.

  21. Josh Knutson says:

    love these lessons / insights

  22. absolutely love this video!

  23. Really interesting video. Btw I watched the video at 03.15 am because I can't sleep. One question out of curiosity: which software do you use to edit your videos and which camera do you use to vlog?

    And you're dogs are so cute! Have a nice Sunday!

    new york: LIKE NEVER
    NON-new york: GUILTY

  25. Milo Moon says:

    Love the vibes and vulnerability in this video. Sometimes I feel like these things are a “me” problem but we’re all human trying to figure it out

  26. we need to learn a lot from ourself

  27. Sam Kawer says:

    How’s Shelby’s mental health

  28. Zac Tidwell says:

    Maybe try moving out of Marxist urban hellscapes. It's worked for thousands of Californians and New Yorkers.

  29. I love trying new things or being in my own bubble for a happy solo day

  30. P.B.M. Money says:

    How is your new business doing ?

  31. Alissa stark says:

    Where is ur T-shirt from?

  32. Julie Knight says:

    Monica thank you for this video …. definitely needed this today.

  33. Toria says:

    I live in Seattle and a stay at home mom, I have been wanting to pick up a hobby for a while now and been thinking about finding a pottery class!! I think I might try Sea-Fab! 😍

  34. MarieNeu says:

    You’re a doll! Thanks for sharing!

  35. MarieNeu says:

    8:03 I’m so jealous that you can wear a sweatshirt and leggings this time of year while enjoying an outdoor activity, like golf! My kids outdoor soccer and softball tournaments, and even practices have been cancelled every day for two weeks because the heat index is above the legal limit for sports lol. It suck’s!!! SO humid here in Louisville, KY!

  36. Troupe Goal says:

    Great video, Monica. Lots of great tips and positivity!

  37. Dorit Bergen says:

    I am many decades older and the two life-long hobbies that give me pleasure these days are half an hour of playing the piano each day (strictly for myself) and knitting twice a week with friends. A new hobby I have taken up is gardening, on a very small scale. Today my breakfast was avocado toast with two slices of a tomato I grew in my backyard. Delicious! I agree, the more I stay in the present and notice the small, good things, the calmer and happier I am.

  38. Goodness, this house is what is really hurting both Monica and Shelby, I hope as soon as they leave this house they'll both feel so much better. The lack of lighting even brings me down. Lighting is so important. Thank, Monica for sharing! You really came from the heart today!

  39. DJ Jimmie M says:

    Great video Monica!!! I hope it goes viral

  40. you're approaching ur Saturn return soon Monique. look to see if u have any virgo or mutable signs in ur chart – Saturn is harshly aspecting that. also look to see if you have Late degree Capricorn in your chart – Pluto has been teetering on the late degrees for the last year , gearing to enter Aquarius this year, for the next 20 years. Pluto is a difficult transformative planet that can cause distress. it. will break you down and force you to rebuild your life, as a learning lesson. lastly look to see where the nodes are in your chart. North node just entered Aries, south node in Libra, this is another enormous shift that'll take place for the next few years. Also note that negative mars aspects can cause disruption and lack of sleep. im just ur average girl with floor length pigtails, but that's. just me.

  41. Wow this actually is so relatable and never was able to articulate how “dreaming big” and “future fantasizing” can sometimes be hurtful when you’re putting too much emphasis on the future. ( 4:48 ) I thought I was doing myself a favor to my future self but it can actually be hurting your current peace. Thank you for being so vulnerable about this Monica!!

  42. The most happy people i know don't have much. They actually have sadnesses and suffering in their lives. That allows them to have a foundation of real gratitude.
    It has nothing to do or have more of this or that – material or reinforcing narcissism. It really isn't about you

  43. Cooking is one of my lifelong hobbies! I needed a creative outlet during the pandemic lockdown, and now 3.5 years later, I'm really great at making delicious food and it still serves as a creative outlet for me!

  44. Great video today Monica. A quick question did you buy the pizza for the video or was it a coincidence? God Bless till next time.

  45. Ella says:

    hey Monica, thank you for sharing your journey! this is super inspiring and i am so happy to watch this on a Sat morning! definitely gave me some ideas on how to reset and get out of the rut I'm currently in

  46. Parker Green says:

    You’re such an inspiration Monica!

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